Buddy

The Ughhing is over.

Actually there was really never that much of it anyways.

Let me recap for Grandma Beth and my absent husband.

Here is me and my knees on the way to Big Show

The people at the surgery center were so sweet and helpful. 

I had to get changed into my fun gown, hat, leg sleeve (thug NBA style), and sockies.

[Yeah I probably took a picture of myself in the mirror where I had to pull a chair up and stand on it to get the picture, but I will not share that here. Spencer had to witness my Thugness).

I went from there to all the pre-op work and questions.

I ended up knowing a few people that worked there and that was comforting. 

 I got over my fear of the IV thanks to the nurse who old me to go to a happy place and I choose Disneyland and she said I should be on Space Mountain while I'm there...happiness.

Once it was hooked up, and all the pre-op stuff was done, the rest was history. 

Josh took me to the surgery table and the temperature dropped 100 degrees.

Freezing.

Nobody tells you that, but if you've ever experienced it, then you know.

I have extra chattery teeth so you could say it showed. 

Cutie Josh got me two, out of the dryer warm blankets, and draped them over my body and arms.

I remember walking in smiling and laughing to myself, because I was in a live episode of Grey's. 

I was inside the action. 

I looked at everything and took it in, while chattering, noticing how fancy it all was.

I wasn't allowed to wear contacts or glasses, so I was already a bit blurry, but I think things got blurrier. 

I couldn't quite figure out why no one was talking to me, and everything was so quiet. 

Especially because there was like 3 nurses and my anathesiologist in there. 

There I was on the table, with my body ready to be worked on, getting no attention.
RUDE

At one point I think I yelled out something really funny like, "Hey guys, get to work, and do good."

Cricket Cricket

Once I started recapping all that, I realized that they had already dopped me up at this point.

Why else would I say that, thinking it was hilarious.
So they weren't being rude, I was being cray.

I remember the anathesiologist asking me to turn on my side and whispering the next 3 things he said.

I thought how rude he was to not talk louder or to only be talking to his assistant. 

Yeah, he wasn't, I was drugged. Nicest guy ever actually.

After I heard him say, "You're going to feel everything I'm about to do," followed by 3 large needles,
I was out.

He put a nerve blocker in the back of my knee and at my hip. 

This numbed my leg for the surgery and the next like day or two. 

Awesome. Seriously.

I woke up in the recovery room when the nurses were putting my clothes back on. 

It's 100% fair to say I was on one. 

I kept telling the nurses, "I think I'm faking it because I know everything I'm saying and I can't stop."

They said I had already been on a comic routine/spilling my secrets 20 min before I even knew. 

Oh also, the recovery room is just a big open room, no filter.

Things I said...

-Jeff is so cute, my doctor's assistant, so attractive, huh. RIGHT?!

-Look at my underwear, they are lime green! Isn't that so fun.

(The underwear story is that I had to wear only a bra and underwear under my gown and being that I came from out of town, I don't travel with "underwear" or "panties" I hardly even own them. SO on our way to the surgery I had to pick some up...)

-Look at my underwear, guess what! I didn't even have panties before I came! I wasn't going to wear any! I was just going to wear...nothing. But don't worry I stopped at CVS on the way and got these so so cute Lime green panties!! Look at them.

(Fill in everything in between what I said with Valley Girl laughter and odd sound effects/faces)

-Guys guess what...I nererr been drunk or druggied before. No never really! I haven't drank or done drugs so this is soooo weird and fun. And my high school friends always thought it would be so funny to get me wasted, but I didn't, but I woulda been funny huh...huh?! I shoulda, should I have? 

(cutie young nurse replies, it's not all it's cracked up to be. Gol I'm a dork)

-Did you guys SEE how cute Jeff was?!

As they were pulling on my workout shorts:

"Hey guys (whispering)...do you see what's on my shorts?"

"Chicago marathon...wow. Good job, you won't be able to do that for a while"

"Yeah, but guys, shhh, don't tell anyone but I got these at DI---no no TJ MAXX! They already had that on there! I thought it would make me look so cool. (Literal hehehehehe's)"

"Oh and look at my shorts they have built in underwear! See! I didn't even need these panties! I don't even wear underwear. But these ones are lime green"

Dr.Bigler came in and sat by me and explained how surgery went. I didn't hear a word, don't remember a thing, except that I had to tell him "Guess what, bet you didn't know, but you played basketball with my dad before. Only like once or twice, but...cool huh"

He left after that.

This went on for another 20 min while my mom came in and sat with me and I tried to pull it together. 

They gave me crackers and water and I slowed myself down a bit.

Tried to have an adult normal conversation with a friend that worked there, don't know how well that came off. Pretty sure I told her to throw a party at my house this weekend while my parents were gone.

She didn't.

So, then they wheeled what I'm sure I'll be known as, Underwear girl who loves Jeff, out to the car and I said thank you and sorry like a thousand times.

I think I even said "I swear I'm way cooler than that." a bunch....

Gosh.

Anyways.

Everything went good. I slept, iced, medicated, for two days and then went in for physical therapy.

I got really nauseous doing anything for a while, thanks to my meds, so I weened myself off a bit, but at therapy they finally took off my giant brace and let me see my battle wound. 

Not too bad. 

He explained in depth what they did in surgery...

Science/Medicine/Anatomy is BONKERS.

All I really got out of it is that I have a cadaver ligament as my new ACL.

I named him Buddy.

I asked if I could get an address to send a thank you.

They said no.

They didn't laugh.

Spencer is calling it MJ, hoping it was part of Michael Jackson and that I'll be able to dance like a king.

Friday and Saturday have been super boring.

Really boring.

Hence why this is so long.

I'm bored.

I'm getting stronger though, doing exercises, trying to get Buddy to calm down or loose weight.

Also I was home alone Friday night and scared out of my mind.

Thinking about how I'm just ripe for the picking, defenseless.

So that leaked into my dream and I had the same dream 4 times that I couldn't get out of

UNTIL I woke up full out man screaming.

Tried to call my parents - the house line was scratchy (REALLY?!)

Then finally got ahold of my dad on his cell, asked where he was (on the road) and burst out balling.

Full on just balling.

D R U G S
Since my dad was on the road that meant I finally woke up from my dream because my dad was in the dream, in my house.

FHEW.

Now's when I probably stop, huh?

Well I am doing great, really.

Happy and looking forward to Buddy and I's new life together.

I think we're going to take names and kick something.

FYI - super grateful for family

My mom is an angel
My dad hurts about it more than I do

My siblings are the sweetest

My in-laws all sent flowers

I'm really lucky

Thank you family

And I leave you now with pictures of my friend and it's friends.

I had a tail for a few days. It's from my machine friend Wilbur. Wilbur makes my knee cold, it's nice.

Ellen is another friend of mine, now that I'm home at 3pm and bored, I can watch her dance. Buddy is kind of a chubbb. But he looks real nice. Worked on with love. The two single staples are actually where the two divets are at the bottom of your knee.  They'll find their place there one day.

Jeff, the one I'm apparently in love with, at my pre-op I had a serious discussion with him on scars.
I discussed how knees were already pretty ugly, but that I was kind of attached to mine, so if he could make sure they looked just as lovely if not more, I would be much obliged.
He jokily replied, "oh yeah, I'll sign my name and come with a design, no problem. I understand".
Well I didn't fully comprehend what the marks were until 2 days after my surgery when they took the brace off and I was in bed that night.
I smiled real big to myself.
I'd say he had some nice handy work


Oh and this is my husband. We're no stranger to the facetime/google hangout/skype scene. Don't worry, it's fine, we're completely in love and obsessed with eachother. Things just work out weird for us.  He laughs at me a lot since surgery.

Oh and today Sunday, I've never been more happy to go to 3 hours of church.
I was so elated, it was wonderful.
So nice to get out and be around people I love.
But man the second I walked in the door it all hit me.
WIPED OUT.
o u c h
Worth it.

ugh

Timing in life has been real funny for me the last couple years. 

Things happen at weird times, causing weird timing and weird situations. 

Welp, I'm in Vegas right now, again. 

And I'm getting ACL surgery tomorrow. Long overdue. 

Somehow it seems like super weird/bad timing, and at the same time the only thing that makes sense. The best timing. 

So here's to hoping it is. 

And that it's all smooth and cool, cause right now I'm only writing to let the rambling out.

You could say I'm a tid bit nervous anxious.

ugh.

Oh, and mostly, I'm going to miss my knee being pretty. 

Well at least as pretty as knees can be.

(I'm having a photo sesh with this last version of it right now)

Scars build character right?

ugh.

OK - DONE UGHhhing.
(Note - don't start watching Grey's Anatomy the day before such an event...Just don't. Or do?
I won't say it, but insert title word here)

My life is usually in pictures - so now some words - real words - lots

I have so many things that I want to post about BUT I think I should probably update on our life status as of late. Some people are confused as to where we are and what we're doing, some think that we're keeping secrets, some think that we're still living in Korea, some actually could care less or haven't thought about it...SO for all, I shall put your minds at ease. (Cause I know all you do is think about us and our lives....ok just Grandma Beth).

Lets start back a bit

This last year has been a bit crazy. 

After Spencer got back from Korea last August we said goodbye to Utah and said hello to Vegas. 

We said hello to an upgraded apartment by like 500 million sq ft...aka my parents house. They are the best landlords in the world. Especially because for the first 5 months or so Morgan and Kaylee were there with us too. It was fun and convenient. 

In that time I was doing a few weddings at the get go and then started working full time for Dr. Richard Groom's OBGYN office. It was my favorite. I loved every person in that office and the others and truly truly learned a lot about a lot. Not just the real word for Bajingo, or that it's pap smear not "shmear" - as in you don't put it on a bagel. Eh...I met ladies that really gave me a different out look on life, which made me love it more, which made me more open. They became people who I feel like I could call now, and at any point to as for direction AND I would follow their every word. 

(Why yes Stephanie, you're right, I should move into your DC apartment with you.)

Spencer was working at my dad's office at this time, taking LSAT prep course, then taking the LSAT, applying for law school, then waiting to hear back from law schools, then deciding and waiting. 

And waiting. 

Before this point the reason we moved to Las Vegas was because Spencer was going to go to Business school. That was the idea. And most all schools he going to apply to required 1-2 years work experience. Therefore, one year in Vegas to work and apply. Few months in, it came out that he had really been thinking about law school a lot. Since like high school too, but Korea let his mind wander. So that decision was made and the process changed at that point. 

SOOO we worked hard and we played hard. THUS why everyone always said "oh my you travel a lot" or "oh my you guys are always gone". Well yes, we took every weekend we had to visit family and travel. We basically only ever went to Utah (family and free stay) and Anaheim (family and free stay) but apparently it appeared we were world travelers. We'll take it! Sure. But we soaked up every spare moment and weekend and tried to live as much in that year with the little strings attached we had at that time in our lives. 

Come June/July we stopped working. I was the girls camp director for the Monte Cristo ward (MUCH more on that another time) so I stopped working a week before camp to prepare. BUT then after girls camp I went back for a few days on and off to help out and train - hence the confusion for those who thought I left and then noticed I was back again. I couldn't leave that office hangin'! I'd go back once a week if they wanted.

Spencer stopped work the last week of July which was when we left for Anaheim (that will be posted later as well) to stay with Zach and Jana for something like 12 days. We were there a Friday to a Tuesday. Spencer had Law School preview at USC that week from Mon-Sat so we doubled that as our summer trip together. Again - I'll post like 7,000 pics of that later....exciting...I know. 

We left that trip and had about 3-4 days in Vegas to pack our whole life up (I mean whole life. I never moved out of my bedroom from when I was 18 so...that made for some entertainment. I can say I know how to fold orgami notes to pass again), and get any loose ends tied up before we moved for law school.  I got my hair done, had interviews, dr. appointments, and didn't make much time to tell anyone where we were going or THAT we were going (even my brother text me, did you move?) 

 Lunch break in our empty bedroom

 While watching the Oly's (miss em so much) and trying not to fall asleep

The catch - we didn't quite know what the story with that was yet. 

SO the reason some of you didn't know is because WE didn't know.

We packed up all of our stuff so it was ready to be put in a moving truck, and left it in the garage. !!!!!Becasue we didn't have anywhere to put it!!!!!

We drove to Phoenix 2 Sundays ago and stayed with our dearest friends Emily and Paul. 

THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR HOUSING US AND CARING FOR US AND LOVING US! 

I put that in all caps because not 48 hours after staying with them and getting all their advice on where to live and deciding to live by them and be their best friends forever, I picked Spencer up and he told me that we were moving to San Diego.

We went straight to Emily and Paul's, Emily poked her sleepy head out and I said to go back to sleep cause we were leaving. "When will you be back?" "No we're like leaving...to San Diego."

Insert saddest face ever here.

Sorry Em.

I love you.

I was sad too.

But also, I was real excited.

FINALLY WE KNEW WHERE WE'D BE LIVING 

You. have. no. idea.

So...

Spencer's dad was on business in Tucson, so in the car we headed, 2 hours south to have a late night celebratory dinner with Reege -- AND a slumber party on our air mattress we brought along. The next morning we got some McD's, some words of advice, hugs, and went on our way. 

TO SAN DIEGO

(Mexico-easy access apparently. Also found out there's a Calexico in the US & Mexicali in Mexico -  huh - original)

 We passed border control - even though I was almost not sure if I was a US citizen - those dudes are intimidating. They pride themselves in their success too...

I Hotwired us a hotel. Won't tell you how many stars, but it had to be a classy joint with "Les Girls XXX" sharing the corner. Classy. Sometimes when you live within your means you get what you pay for. It wasn't terrible, but the air matress...lets just say it's been a real good investment. 

We spent the next few days trying to figure out school and life and living. I drove and drove and drove trying to figure out which area to live in. (Don't worry, they creatively and kindly label every area [this being just a few] of town with a cool sign. Nifty. I thought this was fun)

 I lived in Spencer's schools library until he was done and we could go wear our shoes in our hotel and not touch anything before we went to bed. 

Lots of long hours looking at a computer screen, driving, thinking, change, brings migraines.

 A coke zero in 75 degrees with a view helps.

I also introduced myself to this gorgeous place with a session and that was heavenly. 

 It was a nice break from the chaos for me. As least that always stays the same.

I needed some calm 'cause dees stress zits were getting outta hand!

Weekend came and I hotwired us a bunch more hotels. Look, I'm all about best price stuff and could care less about convenience at this point. 

So if that means bouncing to 4 different beds in a matter of 7 days then

THAT'S FINNNNNNE

It's just I couldn't figure out where to live or find what we wanted and I wasn't going to settle.

Luckily we went up to Anaheim for Saturday and Sunday night where Zach and Jana let us be there roommate once again. And use there internet, and their minds and advice.

The moral to this bonkers adventure is you do what you have to do. 

You get it done

(This sign was in Kneaders where we stopped for lunch & I stole it - OK I didn't, but I would have)

So I can say we have an address now! It's real.

 Well almost real. Like I'll be real excited for when we can go back to Vegas and actually move.

Like get all that stuff in our garage and stop living out of our little Balue Honda. 

 We've got a washer and dryer now. And a blow up bed and a microwave. So we're good. 

But mostly we've got a plan now. And we can answer questions finally.

And truth be told, it's been a wild ride : fun, crazy, spontaneous; and we're good just doing it all together. Really, that's how we do it. We're a pretty good duo. You learn a lot about yourself when your living out of a suitcase and you have no idea where the next 24 hours will take you. 

#gypsylife

Shout out to SJO and good luck good sir.

That's all journal

(sorry for all those words, we'll keep it to pictures from now on)

LOVE 

Rachel 

 p.s. My white pillow case is yellowing...uhhhh yeah we prolly need that washing machine reallll soon

p.p.s. Did I mention we kissed this grizzledness goodbye? 

AND that I'm real excited to hit up Petco Park again.

Vegas = Nieces = Joyous

Remember that one time when I technically don't live in Vegas anymore? We're currently gypsy's -- Whatever -- but I'm now thinking of some of things I'm going to miss.
My absolute favorite part of living in Vegas has been being around a larger part of my family. Unfortunately I can't have them all to myself, but I get a good group of them.

 The best group...my nieces. 

It's fine, I'm allowed to have favorites. Who else will play with me and cuddle me and give me kisses. Not the way these girls can. SO Instead recap every event I want to share my favorite parts of being here. I get to be apart of their lives in the funnest cutest times.

Prepare for sassy-cute-beautiful-goofy-silly little girl overload.

First up birthdays. Give me a reason to celebrate, easy, you get a present. Give me the person to celebrate with...jackpot. And make those birthdays for people up the age of 10...duh. Heaven.

This birthday lead to a baptism. Normally I travel for these special occasions, this only took a nice walk across the street. Convenient and perfect. 

Mother daughter

 With the Leavitt grandparents.

The Taylor grandparents

The things an 8 year old can do in a pretty white dress. . .

All my nieces and nephews (minus one lil Deany boy)

When I was 8 years old I got a journal with my name on it (typical), but I wrote in that things until it was 5 million% chalked full. I took Rylee aside and showed her it and what I wrote the day I was baptized. I showed her what I wrote the day she was born and how excited I was. I showed her all the times I wrote I was in love with boys and that I wrote in all caps taking up an 8 x 11 page "I LOVE (Fill in the blank with 4 different boys names on rotation. One being her uncle which she found hilarious and always wants me to show people). I was so happy to find her already filling 4 pages half way through the day "I love her journal, you're totally awesome." Moving stuff. 

I got to go to their sporting events and run around with the non-performers of the day. 

 If you didn't notice...Rylee is -- REAL TALL

 While Logy pants steals her moms Diet Coke and kicks back...

 Tally finds friends to climb trees with.

And the best. Recitals. Singing, dancing, these divas pull out all the stops. And I love watchin' the sass come out on stage. I hate though how old they look with make up on.

 Above- Singers company performance. Getting as much love from them as I can steal.
Below- The cutest Bunker Dance sweethearts I've ever known.

Taking it all in. Presh.

 Sisters

 

 Aunt Jana and Uncle Zach

 The whole Leavitt family

 Posin' her sass off

 Daddy daughter love

 

 "Pappa...I wan up. I wan yoor chulders"

 Tally smile please...yep just like that

 Who the show is really about - the mama. (I took this because I wanted to get the Smith Center in it...such a cool place. Glad Vegas could get something worth while).

And thus ends the love and gag sesh of my darling family and nieces. Wish I could have them all here with me. Not so lucky. But I'm really lucky I got at least this much of them as I'm not going to have them at my disposal anymore. Bugga...wish I coulda had even more of them. And to all my other fam that's around - their parents, Mo and Kaylee, Mom and Pop - I don't slaughter you with pictures, but I love you too.